By NO means am I thin yet, but I just noticed that I can feel my collar bone!!! The layers of fat are melting away!!! My body must really be in a good place right now, because I have had more carbs this past week than I normally do, and I've lost 7-1/2 lbs in the last 8 days, when I was expecting a MAJOR plateu. I was at 260 lbs. for quite a while several years ago, but I sailed right past it and kept going! (260 was what I weighed when I met my husband in 1994.) The other milestone for the week was that I discovered I could finally wear my REAL wedding ring again. When I had lost a lot of weight 5 years ago, I had sized it down from a 9 to a 6-1/2. Obviously, it hasn't fit well since shortly after that. The interesting thing, though, is I wasn't expecting it to fit for another 50 lbs!!!
It's interesting how long it took to jump to a smaller size early on after this surgery, but lately, it's happening much faster. When I began this journey, I was wearing a 4/5X or 34/36. I am now wearing a 22/24, and sometimes even an 18/20, depending on the cut. Just for fun, I tried on a pair of size 20 jeans that I had tucked away quite a few years ago. Not expecting them to fit, I thought I would just see how much futher I had to go. To my surprise, they fit perfectly!!! That got me on a role, and I ended up going through BOXES of clothes. I have 3 large boxes ready to donate to D.I. (Deseret Industries), and at least that many more that I'm planning to sell on Ebay, in hopes of making a few bucks to help with Christmas expenses (and all the new clothes I keep accumulating!).
I took a bit of a stroll down memory lane, going through so many years of clothes. I am finally at a place where I'm OK getting rid of my larger sizes, because I know I will NEVER need them again. It was an amazing feeling to emotionally sever all ties with those things that I've been hanging on to for so long. I honestly feel no remorse about letting them go. I really do hope someone else can get some good use out of them, because I'm DONE with them!!! I also took a look at a few things I have always hung on to since High School, thinking someday, I'll fit into them again (but not REALLY believing it). Not that I would actually wear them, but just to know that they fit would be true satisfaction. It was amazing to me, looking at my size 9 pair of jeans, that I actually thought I was HUGE back then! I had such a distorted self-image as a teen, but what I failed to recognize was that I had a very developed woman's body and constantly compared myself to my tiny friends who took so many more years to lose that "little girl" figure. What an unfair comparison...
I am now at a point in my life where I can see beyond that, and feel so grateful every day that I have a chance to re-discover who I really am, both on the inside and on the outside. I'm learning to like my body. I don't LOVE it yet, but I truly appreciate where I am, and can see hope for a much healthier self-image that I can be comfortable with as an adult.
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